Gotta love shoulder sequence.
I got so much stuff I want to show but I feel like crap, yet at times I feel like it never happened. I got new books over the weekend. I got that Twilight book...about the young vampire Bree. It just came out actually. I also got this book called The Last Vampire, and it is off the damn chain. I love it. Hard to put it down.
Can I get off subject for a minute?
I have a fear. A real fear. I am going to share it online because I do not care if anyone knows. I want to get it out and off my chest. So here it is. I am terrified, absolutely terrified of children. They don't scare me as in I want to hide but the thought of having one scares the shit out of me. I have no clue why. I always feel like you have to be a certain person to be a mom. I am so not "that" person. I just can not imagine someone relying on me for everything. That is super scary. I look at my parents (who had me at 31) and they seemed to be the perfect parents. My mom stayed at home and my dad went to work and read books. Like my family was very "leave it to beaver" like. So I look at myself and I look at Greg and I just do not see parents. Do I want children? Yes down the line, of course. But sometimes I feel I will never be ready. Kids scare me because its so much responsibilities. I also love my solitude and doing what I want. I spent my whole teen years trying not to get pregnant, so I guess thats why I am so uneasy. I am also the only child. I never had a young sister or brother. I have instincts at all when it comes to children. Is it just me? Should I just live my life and not worry about...you know...baby issues? I do not know.
This is my wallpaper as I type....*sigh*