Wednesday, August 4, 2010

I Shall Get There Someday: Thoughts, Just Thoughts

I have no clue what is going on with me right now. I have two things that I like to do but I think I am always second guessing myself. I want to create a way to leave this mind, leave this planet, leave this universe. Just how people escape when they read a book or watch a movie. I want to create a world were only I can escape too. But sometimes I feel like I am fooling myself. Fooling myself to believe that maybe I have something going here. I want to create a world with art but I find myself stumped. I want to create a word with a short story but when I start typing I feel stupid and I start asking myself.."What am I doing?"

I feel like Im losing faith in myself or something. Something is not there. I feel like I have all these ideas, but I am my worst critic and Im shooting my own self down.

I have no clue why I can not create anything anymore. Its like writers block, but I do know what I want to say, its just that I can't spit it out. I look around and see everyone doing there dreams while I just second guess my every motion...

Am I being hard on myself?
Why am I being so judgmental, why can't I just have fun?

Because I feel like I am wasting my time. That is the answer.

Is this normal? Why am I doubting myself all of a sudden? What happened to that girl who did what she liked and never second guessed? Where did she go?


  1. There are two types of artists, ones who have no faith in their work, and those that have way too much faith in their work. There are rarely any artists in the middle.

    You have a wonderfully creative mind, you always have. If you want to make a world, Tia do it! You can, I know you can. You live in a riot of color! Something that is just phenomenal.

    Do you feel like it's a waste of time because you feel like you won't gain anything from it, or do you feel like it's in the way of something else?

  2. Thanks Girl for checking out my blog! ;)
    Your comment was funny!

    Read your post - JUST LET IT OUT! Putting it out there even when you are unsure of the direction is scary, but very much worth it. I have struggled with the very same thing.

    We really are our own worst critics. But, God gave us talents to use.

    Take Care!!

  3. your so fucking AMAZING I love u to death :p